Long live the King…

Hey hey, my adorable internet friends/acquaintances/strangers/enemies. Been a hot minute. See my previous post for a cryptic explanation. (Spoiler I refuse to review books, which is normally a thing I love doing, if having to review books is a thing I HAVE to do, I don’t know why, I AM AN ONION, I am LAYERED.)




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Wedding planning:

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General state mind:

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Today, I’m talking about my most anticipated read of 2019. THERE WILL BE EMOTIONS. And gifs. Of course.


Cover Talk


The Summary Heist

Nikolai Lantsov has always had a gift for the impossible. No one knows what he endured in his country’s bloody civil war—and he intends to keep it that way. Now, as enemies gather at his weakened borders, the young king must find a way to refill Ravka’s coffers, forge new alliances, and stop a rising threat to the once-great Grisha Army.

Yet with every day a dark magic within him grows stronger, threatening to destroy all he has built. With the help of a young monk and a legendary Grisha Squaller, Nikolai will journey to the places in Ravka where the deepest magic survives to vanquish the terrible legacy inside him. He will risk everything to save his country and himself. But some secrets aren’t meant to stay buried—and some wounds aren’t meant to heal.

Robyn Says

Okay. OKAY. O k a y.

So if you’re a fan of the Grisha or Six of Crows series, you will already know about this book, have probably already read it, and are like SHUT UP ROBYN YOU TWIT LET’S PLEASE JUST FLAIL TOGETHER. In which case,

If you haven’t or aren’t, what the **** is wrong with you, friendo?S

Seriously, though. I’ve been waiting for a Nikolai book since the moment he sauntered into the my life. He is my favourite character in the Grisha series by far, so when Leigh Bardugo announced he would be getting his own books, I was delighted.

Needless to say, the expectations were high. In all fairness, I don’t know if any book could have met them. But King of Scars came veryyyyyy close. There was a great, intriguing plot, further world-building, complex characters both familiar and new, and enough twists and turns to leave me surprised at the ending.

I devoured this book in less than two days, so I might need to reread it at a slower pace to appreciate everything, but the only real issues I had were that I wanted more romance (yeah, I know, whatever, I am a simple woman, make them all kiss please) and that I felt there were some pacing issues. Even with so much happening, at times the story seemed to drag at certain points. I also would have liked more information about the Saints and how that all worked (no spoilers, but what the heck????)

Overall though, amazing, love it, bring on book 2!!!!!!!!!

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Holy frozen bananas, READ IT. But fair warning, you’re definitely gonna need to read the Grisha series first (and also maybe the Six of Crows duology because NINAAAAAAAAAAA)

Best Lines

“Most women suffer thorns for the sake of the flowers, but we who wield power adorn ourselves with flowers to hide the sting of our thorns” UMMMMMM TATTOO THIS ON MY BODY PLEASE

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Fancasting couch

OH YES okay where do we start……….


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The Darkling REDACTED but you know who it is:

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God I’m good.

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Book Boyfriend material

THERE IS NO QUESTION: Sturmhond, Korol Rezni, little sobachka, the Too-Clever Fox, Nikolai freaking Lanstov.

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9 out of 10 gorgeous tormented monster boys.

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I got nothing. Have some kittens.


You’re welcome. Until next time, my dudes.

-xo, R


NetGalley Review: Will Haunt You

This is a horror novel unlike anything I’ve ever read. From the very first sentence, the eerie, creepy vibes will have you turning pages to find out what happens next. An intriguing premise and highly readable prose make this a book you’ll remember. Following ex-rocker Jesse from a one-night reunion with his old band into a nightmarish ordeal that may or may not have something to do with a cursed book given to him by his old bandmate, Will Haunt You will have readers questioning what’s real and what’s a figment of the darkest parts of Jesse’s imagination.

The ideas are fresh and unique, and Kirk is excellent at making the hair on the back of your neck stand up, but I thought that some of the story was disjointed and at times confusing. That also added to the aura of dread overall, and there were some great twists. I would recommend this book to horror fans looking for something a little different. I’m excited to see what Brian Kirk writes next.

Many thanks to Flame Tree Press and Brian Kirk, as well as NetGalley, who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions expressed in this review are my own.

Expected publication: March 14, 2019


Same as it ever was… and the return of the nonverbal referral

Seventeen days into this year and I’ve already checked if mercury is retrograde like thirty times, so that should give you some idea of where I’m at. Things fall apart, friendos, and in this wise words of the Talking Heads, well how did I get here???

The only thing going right so far, touch wood, is the books. I’ve set my 2019 Goodreads challenge at 105 books, and I’m currently sitting at 11, which puts me 7 books ahead of schedule. Yay me.

Today I’m nonverbally reviewing Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J. Maas, the long-awaited and much-anticipated conclusion to the Throne of Glass series.

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Ready? Ok, here we go…

I think I’ve hit my Maas threshold. Enough already.

Back eventually with actual words.

– xo, R


NetGalley Review: Little Darlings

This highly readable debut from author Melanie Golding is a clever and creepy reinterpretation of classic folk- and fairy-tales. An elegant melding of crime fiction, fantasy, and horror, it tells the story of a young, isolated mother convinced that her newborn twin baby boys have been switched with “changelings” by a malevolent fairy creature. She is dismissed as unhinged by local law enforcement, except for a rogue police officer convinced there is more to the story than meets the eye.

Every sentence is infused with suspense and dread. The visceral imagery conjured straight from the darkest fairy tales will keep readers trying to decide who is telling the truth until the final page. I also thoroughly enjoyed the inclusion of excerpts from fairytales and folktales from around the world, providing context for readers who may not be as familiar with some of the lore alluded to in the novel.

Many thanks to Crooked Lane Books and Melanie Golding, as well as NetGalley, who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions expressed in this review are my own.

Expected publication: April 30, 2019

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2018: So long, and thanks for all fish (literally)

Hello hello you gorgeous gleaming diamond-encrusted Fabergé eggs. Yes, it’s that time of year again, god help us. Another list. I’m sure you’re as sick of these wrap-ups and rankings as I am, but hey, sometimes you have to do stuff you don’t want to, like decide on a wedding reception playlist with your antagonistic and hard-headed fiance… right, Al?

Perfectly said, as always.

So as we shed the rotting skin of 2018 and strut fresh-faced and socksure into the new year, let’s take a look back at my most highly-rated reads over the past 12 months.

The Cruel Prince by Holly Black


Jude was seven when her parents were murdered and she and her two sisters were stolen away to live in the treacherous High Court of Faerie. Ten years later, Jude wants nothing more than to belong there, despite her mortality. But many of the fey despise humans. Especially Prince Cardan, the youngest and wickedest son of the High King.

To win a place at the Court, she must defy him–and face the consequences.

As Jude becomes more deeply embroiled in palace intrigues and deceptions, she discovers her own capacity for trickery and bloodshed. But as betrayal threatens to drown the Courts of Faerie in violence, Jude will need to risk her life in a dangerous alliance to save her sisters, and Faerie itself.

Kachka: A Return to Russian Cooking by Bonnie Frumkin Morales


Yes, it’s a cookbook.









Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng


Lydia is dead. But they don’t know this yet.

So begins this exquisite novel about a Chinese American family living in 1970s small-town Ohio. Lydia is the favorite child of Marilyn and James Lee, and her parents are determined that she will fulfill the dreams they were unable to pursue. But when Lydia’s body is found in the local lake, the delicate balancing act that has been keeping the Lee family together is destroyed, tumbling them into chaos. 

A profoundly moving story of family, secrets, and longing, Everything I Never Told You is both a gripping page-turner and a sensitive family portrait, uncovering the ways in which mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, and husbands and wives struggle, all their lives, to understand one another.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng


In Shaker Heights, a placid, progressive suburb of Cleveland, everything is meticulously planned – from the layout of the winding roads, to the colours of the houses, to the successful lives its residents will go on to lead. And no one embodies this spirit more than Elena Richardson, whose guiding principle is playing by the rules.

Enter Mia Warren – an enigmatic artist and single mother – who arrives in this idyllic bubble with her teenage daughter Pearl, and rents a house from the Richardsons. Soon Mia and Pearl become more than just tenants: all four Richardson children are drawn to the alluring mother-daughter pair. But Mia carries with her a mysterious past, and a disregard for the rules that threatens to upend this carefully ordered community.

Little Fires Everywhere explores the weight of long-held secrets and the ferocious pull of motherhood-and the danger of believing that planning and following the rules can avert disaster, or heartbreak.

Astonish Me by Maggie Shipstead


“Astonish Me” is the irresistible story of Joan, a ballerina whose life has been shaped by her relationship with the world-famous dancer Arslan Ruskov, whom she helps defect from the Soviet Union to the United States. While Arslan’s career takes off in New York, Joan’s slowly declines, ending when she becomes pregnant and decides to marry her longtime admirer, a PhD student named Jacob. As the years pass, Joan settles into her new life in California, teaching dance and watching her son, Harry, become a ballet prodigy himself. But when Harry’s success brings him into close contact with Arslan, explosive secrets are revealed that shatter the delicate balance Joan has struck between her past and present.
In graceful, inimitable prose, Shipstead draws us into an extraordinary world, and the lives of her vivid and tempestuous characters. Filled with intrigue, brilliant satire, and emotional nuance, “Astonish Me” is a superlative follow-up to Shipstead’s superb debut.

Three Daughters of Eve by Elif Shafak


Peri, a married, wealthy, beautiful Turkish woman, is on her way to a dinner party at a seaside mansion in Istanbul when a beggar snatches her handbag. As she wrestles to get it back, a photograph falls to the ground — an old polaroid of three young women and their university professor. A relic from a past — and a love — Peri had tried desperately to forget.

Three Daughters of Eve is set over an evening in contemporary Istanbul, as Peri arrives at the party and navigates the tensions that simmer in this crossroads country between East and West, religious and secular, rich and poor. Over the course of the dinner, and amidst an opulence that is surely ill-begotten, terrorist attacks occur across the city. Competing in Peri’s mind however are the memories invoked by her almost-lost polaroid, of the time years earlier when she was sent abroad for the first time, to attend Oxford University. As a young woman there, she had become friends with the charming, adventurous Shirin, a fully assimilated Iranian girl, and Mona, a devout Egyptian-American. Their arguments about Islam and feminism find focus in the charismatic but controversial Professor Azur, who teaches divinity, but in unorthodox ways. As the terrorist attacks come ever closer, Peri is moved to recall the scandal that tore them all apart.

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas


Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed.

Soon afterward, his death is a national headline. Some are calling him a thug, maybe even a drug dealer and a gangbanger. Protesters are taking to the streets in Khalil’s name. Some cops and the local drug lord try to intimidate Starr and her family. What everyone wants to know is: what really went down that night? And the only person alive who can answer that is Starr.

But what Starr does—or does not—say could upend her community. It could also endanger her life.

The Silent Companions by Laura Purcell


When Elsie married handsome young heir Rupert Bainbridge, she believed she was destined for a life of luxury. But with her husband dead just weeks after their marriage, her new servants resentful, and the local villagers actively hostile, Elsie has only her husband’s awkward cousin for company. Or so she thinks. Inside her new home lies a locked door, beyond which is a painted wooden figure–a silent companion–that bears a striking resemblance to Elsie herself. The residents of The Bridge are terrified of the figure, but Elsie tries to shrug this off as simple superstition–that is, until she notices the figure’s eyes following her.

A Victorian ghost story that evokes a most unsettling kind of fear, this is a tale that creeps its way through the consciousness in ways you least expect–much like the silent companions themselves.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones


Newlyweds Celestial and Roy are the embodiment of both the American Dream and the New South. He is a young executive, and she is an artist on the brink of an exciting career. But as they settle into the routine of their life together, they are ripped apart by circumstances neither could have imagined. In this deft exploration of love, loyalty, race, justice, and both Black masculinity and Black womanhood in 21st century America, Jones achieves that most-elusive of all literary goals: the Great American Novel. 




Circe by Madeline Miller


In the house of Helios, god of the sun and mightiest of the Titans, a daughter is born. But Circe is a strange child—not powerful, like her father, nor viciously alluring like her mother. Turning to the world of mortals for companionship, she discovers that she does possess power—the power of witchcraft, which can transform rivals into monsters and menace the gods themselves.

Threatened, Zeus banishes her to a deserted island, where she hones her occult craft, tames wild beasts and crosses paths with many of the most famous figures in all of mythology, including the Minotaur, Daedalus and his doomed son Icarus, the murderous Medea, and, of course, wily Odysseus.

But there is danger, too, for a woman who stands alone, and Circe unwittingly draws the wrath of both men and gods, ultimately finding herself pitted against one of the most terrifying and vengeful of the Olympians. To protect what she loves most, Circe must summon all her strength and choose, once and for all, whether she belongs with the gods she is born from, or the mortals she has come to love.

Making Up (London Celebrities #3) by Lucy Parker


Once upon a time, circus artist Trix Lane was the best around. Her spark vanished with her confidence, though, and reclaiming either has proved…difficult. So when the star of The Festival of Masks is nixed and Trix is unexpectedly thrust into the spotlight, it’s exactly the push she needs. But the joy over her sudden elevation in status is cut short by a new hire on the makeup team.

Leo Magasiva: disgraced wizard of special effects. He of the beautiful voice and impressive beard. Complete dickhead and—in an unexpected twist—an enragingly good kisser. 

To Leo, something about Trix is…different. Lovely. Beautiful, even though the pint-size, pink-haired former bane of his existence still spends most of her waking hours working to annoy him. They’ve barely been able to spend two minutes together for years, and now he can’t get enough of her. On stage. At home. In his bed.

When it comes to commitment, Trix has been there, done that, never wants to do it again. Leo’s this close to the job of a lifetime, which would take him away from London—and from Trix. Their past is a constant barrier between them.

It seems hopeless. Utterly impossible. And yet…

The Ensemble by Aja Gabel


Brit is the second violinist, a beautiful and quiet orphan; the viola is Henry, a prodigy who’s always had it easy; the cellist is Daniel, the oldest, the angry skeptic who sleeps around; and on first violin is Jana, their flinty, resilient leader. Together, they are the Van Ness String Quartet.

In The Ensemble, each character picks up the melody, from the group’s youthful rocky start through to adulthood. As they navigate devastating failures and wild success, heartbreak and marriage, triumph and loss, betrayal and enduring loyalty, they are always tied together—by career, by the intensity of their art, by the secrets they carry together, and by choosing each other over and over again.

Following these four unforgettable characters, Aja Gabel’s debut novel gives a behind-the-scenes look into the highly competitive, mysterious world of high-level musicians. The story of Brit and Henry and Daniel and Jana, The Ensemble is a heart-skipping portrait of ambition, friendship, and the tenderness of youth.

The Wife by Meg Wolitzer

“The moment I decided to leave him, the moment I thought, enough, we were thirty-five thousand feet above the ocean, hurtling forward but giving the illusion of stillness and tranquility. Just like our marriage.” So opens Meg Wolitzer’s compelling and provocative novel The Wife, as Joan Castleman sits beside her husband on their flight to Helsinki. Joan’s husband, Joseph Castleman, is “one of those men who own the world…who has no idea how to take care of himself or anyone else, and who derives much of his style from the Dylan Thomas Handbook of Personal Hygiene and Etiquette.” He is also one of America’s preeminent novelists, about to receive a prestigious international award to honor his accomplishments, and Joan, who has spent forty years subjugating her own literary talents to fan the flames of his career, has finally decided to stop.

From this gripping opening, Wolitzer flashes back fifty years to 1950s Smith College and Greenwich Village — the beginning of the Castleman relationship — and follows the course of the famous marriage that has brought them to this breaking point, culminating in a shocking ending that outs a carefully kept secret.

Baby Teeth by Zoje Stage


Meet Hanna.

She’s the sweet-but-silent angel in the adoring eyes of her Daddy. He’s the only person who understands her, and all Hanna wants is to live happily ever after with him. But Mommy stands in her way, and she’ll try any trick she can think of to get rid of her. Ideally for good.

Meet Suzette.

She loves her daughter, really, but after years of expulsions and strained home schooling, her precarious health and sanity are weakening day by day. As Hanna’s tricks become increasingly sophisticated, and Suzette’s husband remains blind to the failing family dynamics, Suzette starts to fear that there’s something seriously wrong, and that maybe home isn’t the best place for their baby girl after all.

The Anna Karenina Fix: Life Lessons from Russian Literature by Viv Groskop


Viv Groskop has discovered the meaning of life in Russian literature. As she knows from personal experience, everything that has ever happened in life has already happened in these novels: from not being sure what to do with your life (Anna Karenina) to being in love with someone who doesn’t love you back enough (A Month in the Country by Turgenev) or being socially anxious about your appearance (all of Chekhov’s work). This is a literary self-help memoir, with examples from the author’s own life that reflect the lessons of literature, only in a much less poetic way than Tolstoy probably intended, and with an emphasis on being excessively paranoid about having an emerging moustache on your upper lip, just like Natasha in War and Peace.


A Double Life by Flynn Berry


Claire is a hardworking doctor leading a simple, quiet life in London. She is also the daughter of the most notorious murder suspect in the country, though no one knows it. 

Nearly thirty years ago, while Claire and her brother slept upstairs, a brutal crime was committed in her family’s townhouse. The next morning, her father’s car was found abandoned near the English Channel, with bloodstains on the front seat. Her mother insisted she’d seen him in the house that night, but his powerful, privileged friends maintained his innocence. The first lord accused of murder in more than a century, he has been missing ever since. 

When the police tell Claire they’ve found him, her carefully calibrated existence begins to fracture. She doesn’t know if she’s the daughter of a murderer or a wronged man, but Claire will soon learn how far she’ll go to finally find the truth.

Loosely inspired by one of the most notorious unsolved crimes of the 20th century – the Lord Lucan case – A Double Life is at once a riveting page-turner and a moving reflection on women and violence, trauma and memory, and class and privilege.

That seems like a lot of books, but it’s only the ones I rated 4+ stars on Goodreads. And I did manage to hit my reading goal of 123 books. But to be honest, I don’t feel any satisfaction with that number. Because the truth is… I didn’t read well this year. I rushed through books, discarded them too quickly, read more than one at a time. I didn’t make time for reading, didn’t prioritize it the way I have in the past. And I feel that I have suffered for it. Yes, yes, there were many valid reasons – the new job, the engagement, a suddenly active social life – but there is no denying that part of it was just laziness. I was on my phone more than ever, and the screen time has messed with my attention span and, let’s be honest, my intelligence as well.

So my 2019 reading resolution is this: read better. I will still set a numerical goal for myself, but mostly I want to be more mindful in my reading. What I’m reading, when, how. No more hasty dnfs, no more multiple books on the go, no more reading with a screen in arm’s reach.

And I also kinda want to smash my phone.

OnePlus One

The mood for 2019 is read books, punch Nazis, and love yourself. See you in 2019, kroshkas. Stay shiny.

– xo, R

Nonfiction Benediction: The Return

Good evening, my scrumptious lebkuchens. How are your delicious lives? I for one am glad that November is about to end. It’s been a hell of a month (but isn’t it always?). I completed my probationary period at  November, you ruthless son a bitch, I will be glad to see the back of you. Between Nanowrimo and work and wedding planning, I barely have two brain cells left to rub together.

This week, I’m reviewing Sons of Cain: A History of Serial Killers From the Stone Age to the Present, by Peter Vronsky


Cover Talk

Not too shabby. I approve.

The Summary Heist

From the author of Serial Killers: The Method and Madness of Monsters comes an in-depth examination of sexual serial killers throughout human history, how they evolved, and why we are drawn to their horrifying crimes.

Before the term was coined in 1981, there were no “serial killers.” There were only “monsters”–killers society first understood as werewolves, vampires, ghouls and witches or, later, Hitchcockian psychos.

In Sons of Cain–a book that fills the gap between dry academic studies and sensationalized true crime–investigative historian Peter Vronsky examines our understanding of serial killing from its prehistoric anthropological evolutionary dimensions in the pre-civilization era (c. 15,000 BC) to today. Delving further back into human history and deeper into the human psyche than Serial Killers–Vronsky’s 2004 book, which has been called “the definitive history of the phenomenon of serial murder”–he focuses strictly on sexual serial killers: thrill killers who engage in murder, rape, torture, cannibalism and necrophilia, as opposed to for-profit serial killers, including hit men, or “political” serial killers, like terrorists or genocidal murderers.

These sexual serial killers differ from all other serial killers in their motives and their foundations. They are uniquely human and–as popular culture has demonstrated–uniquely fascinating.

Robyn Says

Okay so this book was kind of underwhelming for me… but I am very picky when it comes to serial killers (don’t ask). From the synopsis, I was expecting a rich study of serial killers throughout history. It kiiiiiiiiiinda delivered – the first few chapters were really great, examining possible evolutionary causes for the phenomenon of serial killers. I would have liked more on that subject, but the author moved pretty quickly into your standard list of serial killers, organized more or less chronologically. It was a good overview, but if you’ve read other books on serial killers, you won’t find anything new.

Still, if you’re just dipping your toe into the true crime genre, this is a very good place to start.


Not bad. Read it, because why not.

Best Lines

“It was only in the mid-1970s, after Ted Bundy started abducting and killing middle-class white college girls at schools, shopping malls, ski chalets, national parks and public beaches, that the media suddenly began paying close attention.”


Fancasting couch

Oh HELL to the nah.

Book Boyfriend material



6.5 out of 10 clones of 14-year-old me, obsessed with all things related to true crime, What a weirdo you were, 14-year-old me. And guess what, you still are.


You know what really bothers me though? The Zodiac. We can put a man on the moon, we should  be able to catch that cryptic fucker. NASA, GET ON THIS.

-xo, R