Let the innuendos commence

Or not. Because there wasn’t a whole lot of innuendo in Anatomy of a Boyfriend by Daria Snadowsky. It was just all… out there. Should I have expected that? There’s a creepy naked Ken doll on the cover, so maybe that should have foreshadowed the creepy naked teen sex shenanigans that awaited. I will admit, I did NOT expect it. Holy graphic sexy times! And am I traumatized?

A little bit.

Honesty time. I did not like this book. I understand why some readers might like it, and I acknowledge its value as an honest, candid, realistic (?) portrayal of teen sexuality. But as a story, as a novel, I felt it was lacking. The pacing was terrible – so sloooooooow! Characters? Boring boring boring. Dom and Wes felt so flat. Why would either of them like the other? What a pair of squares. Other complaints: unrealistic, forced dialogue, TMI (after the break-up, in the washroom – I can never unread that), and a touch of the soapbox – it wasn’t explicit, and maybe it’s just me, but I felt like there was a Theo moment lurking in the denouement. Something along the lines of, as my high school religion teacher would say –

Nope, I can’t type it. I tried, people, but it just brings back too many memories. (A pagan in a Catholic school – now that’s trauma).

Where was I? Subliminal moralizing and what not: don’t just have random sexy times because he’ll inevitably dump you and leave you. I dunno. Maybe I’m completely wrong. I also did not like Dom’s breakdown at the end of the book. I’m sure that’s what happens to some people. Me? Not so much. Am I cold-hearted? Or am I repressing my break-up depression? Or is this book terrible?

Yeah, this book is terrible. Get a punching bag, Dom, break a plate or two, throw down some curses, and get the hell over it. Sheesh.

Good points? A few realistically awkward moments that made me cringe when I read them (especially at the beginning of the relationship), the clinical detachment with which Dom describes her ‘sexual escapades’ – fitting for a wannabe doctor – and the break-up by IM. And the Princess Bride references (although maybe Dom’s love for the Princes Bride had something to do with her being so shattered when what she has with Wes doesn’t turn out to be a storybook love – geddit? Ooooooo, deep insight).

That’s all, folks. I feel too ambivalent about this book to go on. It was hard to get through. It didn’t leave me satisfied and smiling. (You didn’t think I’d get through an entire post about sex without that, did you?)

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